Lincoln Berean Church: Helping couples talk about money

Pastor Kyle Helmink, pastor of counseling and premarital counseling team at Lincoln Berean Church, has been leading the nine week pre-marital class for over 20 yrs. He knew that Dr. John Gottman, well respected psychologist and leader in the field of relationships, stressed that money conversations are never about money—but about what money represents to each person. He points out that money is a symbol, a tool and a metaphor. Dr. Gottman also recommended using cards to bring money into the conversation is a non-confrontational and easier way to start the conversation. Discovering Money Habitudes cards fit the bill to follow Dr. Gottman’s advice.
Pastor Brad Brestel of Lincoln Berean Church leads the specific premarital session on finances due to a strong background as an attorney, financial planner, and small business owner prior to becoming a pastor. He offers other training and services for couples following the class time.

Outcomes

• Really helps couples launch into conversations.
• Couples are able to unpack their values related to money.

How They Use Money Habitudes

• Since discovering Money Habitudes cards, they have incorporated them into their pre-marital program for the past 8-10 years.
• The nine-week course meets once a week for two hours. Finance is one of the 2-hours session. Couples use the cards to play Money Habitudes in the class followed by a class discussion and the option of other classes on budgeting, debt, investing, and an offer of financial coaching for each couple interested.